2/5/16
Anxiety
“I made the word seem prettier than it actually is…
This feeling is absolutely terrible; the over-thinking and the constant worrying seems never-ending. It’s effected my sleep before and sometimes I even forget to eat. Sometimes it leads to horrible panic attacks or anxiety pangs. Sometimes people forget the severity of this disorder. This is getting out of control. I feel like I’m back to the starting line while everyone else is well past the finish line. I want to finish the race with you guys- hold on. It’s back to the point…the point.”
Anxiety makes you feel like a nothing. It makes you feel like no matter how hard you try, no matter what you do- you will never be good enough. It makes you feel like a bother. Everyone else has their own struggles, their own battles, their own lives. Don’t bother them. Why would they even care about you? When are they even going to have time for you? It makes you feel useless. There’s nothing you can do- you’re not special. You couldn’t have any impact on anyone’s live. You’re not that important. It makes you feel small. Because other people have bigger personalities- they can be meaner. Avoid groups. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t get too close. Don’t get close. Don’t let anyone in. Build a wall. Build a fortress.
Now, it’s just you and anxiety.
Journal Author,
Jessica
